Tuesday, 3 December 2013

Dropping into the Ocean

into the Ocean
past the surface

the echo place
of tomb-like silence

unaffected by
ripples and storms of fever

resilience and resonance
holding back
the need to be heard

in the tomb-like silence
waiting for the moment

to pass
to come
to be

into the Ocean
past the surface

holding place

the promise of peace
and salvation

this is
not easy

dropping into the Ocean

Sunday, 3 November 2013

Tiger Spirit

tiger eye gem
embrace your richness
live the world

take courage
have faith
and create

rest in peace Tinu
African Queen
up North

and then 
a walk in the woods
mother asking

you had already come to me
my little tiger
my little playmate

Tiger Spirit
you have been with me
longer than I realised

an innocent gift
of the stuffed tiger
threading the different meanings

overcoming of fear

the news arrived 
that the tiger had died in the zoo
at the same time as 

the princess of wands 

conquering the fear
opening her arms to creation
burying the tiger

these days
strong emotions
storms of anger

encircling and inhabiting
this house
of harmony

yet I have come full circle
in the fields of parliament
the wish come and gone

the loss in my hands
and in my heart
rivers of tears

yet still 


Tiger Spirit
my guide 

Tuesday, 24 September 2013

The Meaning & Symbolism of Motherhood

I have been preoccupied
once more and always
what meaning 
has in my life

How am I being a good mother?
How am I being not so good a mother?
What is it I am giving to my kids?
How do they perceive me?

And then
Out of Nowhere
Another Big Surprise
Another little Bean

An Easter Birth
to relinquish
The Death
of Mother?

Weeks of 
and befriending
making peace
making space

The Arch of Awatening or

And then
once more
the arrival and departure
of another soul energy
in trickles and rivulets 
of shiny bright red

Mother I have forgiven you

What now?
Where from here? 

A baby squirrel is saved
a woman is giving birth in the doorway
What is the meaning?

And then 
Great Mother & Baby
go flying
her feet decapitated 

A Pause
A Listening


Life & Love
is what Motherhood is 

The feminine quiver
of Energy


Mother Earth
Waxing and Waning
the beginning of New Life

Giving Birth to

a Child
A new Way of Life
A new Idea

It is back to Creation

Friday, 26 July 2013

The Clouds gone - Mountain appears

Trecking up the mountain
enveloped by the dark
strange noises of 
animals or human?

Embracing each other
in the eye of the storm
the night persisting
will the sun ever come?

The first rays
slashing through the clouds
illuminating thousands of rocks
is it time to pray?

Smells, sounds, sightings
of another world
of another soul
aren't we all woven from the same cloth?

Our love 1 started and was tested 8
in those humid and blazing and high up lands
the foreign world of no point of reference
sealed for a lifetime's commitment?

Yes sealed for a lifetime's commitment
your journey and my journey
alone and together
together and alone

The Buddha sits perched on the slopes
the light plays with the clouds
the mountain stands

And so we shall go on
my friend
our souls
joined in the endeavour of love

Nicholas Roerich

Tuesday, 18 June 2013

Just because it's beautiful

The beauty of things
settling the noise inside
re-ordering and re-shaping
that which has gone askew

The deep blue
the ivory of love
earthen and from the beyond
cradled by the soft grains of sand

Somewhere out there
there is comfort
there is an order 
that has meaning

And nature
and the world
offers freely
beauty and grace

miraculous growth
despite the harsh conditions
pushing upward 
the order of things

Just because it's beautiful 
that's why I select
the aesthetics of things
lessens my pain

Tuesday, 4 June 2013

Giving Maggie a new life

Come on Maggie
we are going to the seaside

Can I have an ice cream
yes with sprinkle and all

Come on Maggie
lets have some fun

Taste the taste of life
the crusty bread

the blasting colours
of blooms and fabric

Come on Maggie
the joy of life

every time I bake a new loaf
nourishing depth of flavour

a new lease of life
dancing through glades 

with flowing dresses
cradling rabbit and sitting owl

eyes a pond of possibilities 
giving Maggie a new life

You live on 
bubbling up and fermenting

opening up to the divine presence
that you Maggie revealed

your passing
my coming


Tuesday, 21 May 2013


Oh the nerves
oh my boy
you can do it
I can do it

I know

the playtime will not fade
the boys and the sticks will not fade
your sisters' shouts and bouts 
of ownership - this or that way

will not fade

my arch and bow
of holding and encircling
extends and stretches

always and forever
my boy
in my heart and mind

and the reunion
oh so sweet 
and the laughter
oh such joy

leaping bounds of worlds

Monday, 20 May 2013

Grief stricken

what a funny word
grief stricken
struck by grief?

struck by lightening
and thunder
like a bolt from the sky?

or struck down by


strikes a chord
on strike
feeling mad and sad

today I guess
not bothered 
not cared for?

the need to be good
to myself
to find the heart

even if pierced

grief stricken
and on strike
waves of washing liquid

breaking my skin
opening wounds
soothing cream

all over again

and tomorrow 
another day?

Thursday, 9 May 2013

The I-am-bothered-bag

That was her giving-up-bag
her oh-I-can't-be-bothered-bag

I will not give up 
I shall not go down the same path

I got a bright-blue-shiny bag
with neon pink dots
a Fiorelli-fun-out-of-synch-bag

it does stand for containment
and always will

my sadness
my distress
my anger
my raw state of frazzledness

my blue-neon-pink-bag
makes me laugh
makes me want to jump
and stick my tongue out

I am bothered Mama, I am!

A Margaret-Thatcher-hanging-on-me-arm-bag
meaning business
such fun!

and if you man don't behave
I'll whack you round ye head
to keep you in check

my blue-electric-neon-pink-hot-fun-bag
hangs on me arm

my shiny-bright-blue-polka-dot-pink-business-bag

the I-am-unlike Maggie-bothered-bag

I can not give up - not now - ever Mama

Saturday, 4 May 2013

The story of the injured child

The injured child is defenceless and in need of support. She is lying on the ground and has no more strength. She can't stand anymore. 

But help is at hand

Out of the barren landscape of motherly absence grows a mother and child bond, so tender, so beautiful like the soft running sand from the desert, like the waving palm trees, giving shade from the burning sun. It is a bond coming out of that barrenness, from the good of that barrenness. Its offshoots are strength, resilience, power, and quiet-big presence. 

The other help lies in the centre, flowing directly from the injured child. Through the fire she must go. And on the other side she encounters love. And joined hands, in solidarity. 

The Great Mother
as always, is there, an eternal, clear, steady, deeply loving presence. The clarity of her gaze, encircles age old stepping stones and arches of pathways. Behind her, as always, and again and again, the communion of people sharing and partaking in the circle of humanity. 

Lastly, help comes from the ancient rites of passages, from ancient wisdom and ways of survival. On either side the girl has the help of the shepherds, the keepers of the lower kingdom. The boys and the men who can be in the face of loneliness, in the face of bare existence. 

And so the story goes. 

Friday, 19 April 2013

Fragments of the in-between world

 imagine you are that baby
rather than
all curled up
oh yes that is nice

imagine you are pregnant 
rather than
those twins in your swollen tummy
oh yes that is nice

boys this time?

no - girls

always girls 
from top to bottom

somewhere over the rainbow

It is quiet there
where are your bairns?

The girls are brushing their hair

where troubles melt like lemon drops

it is hard to die

why oh why can't I?


you take care

who is going to hang up?


you just caught me in time

shall I hang up?


we lit a candle 
at the end I imagined
I am dead

but not yet

scents - not so much

but touch

freckled and speckled

I know

like a beautiful beach in the morning sun

do you think something is holding you back?

you can go now into the light

It's Easter Sunday

your face like a moon
a beaming smile

I am thinking of them

all the time
from top to bottom

I've been considering that

we will cross in the sky

I'm afraid so

the thread has been cut
triangle shattered

top to bottom



it is good

you are free

the debt has been paid